When a baby dies under 12 weeks
Option 1
The hospital can provide you with a cremation service at Carleton Crematorium. Staff on the ward or area you are being cared for will talk to you about your funeral options. You will be
asked to complete a form which requests Carleton Crematorium to cremate your tiny baby and allows the hospital to make arrangements on your behalf.
This type of service will take approximately six weeks to arrange. If you would like to include mementos, such as letters and photographs, your named nurse or the hospital bereavement office can arrange this for you.
Your baby’s individual casket will then be taken to Carlton Crematorium by the hospital’s funeral director and accompanied by one of the hospital chaplains.
If you would like to attend a small generic service conducted by the hospital chaplain at the crematorium on the day of your baby’s cremation, please contact the Bereavement Support Nurse Specialist who will give you a date; this will always be on a Tuesday at 9am. There will be reflective music for you to listen to. Your baby will be in an individual casket within a larger white one in front of you.
This is not a private service so there may be other families in the crematorium with you. This service will be of no cost to you. Please understand that your baby is really tiny at this point in your pregnancy. The crematorium will endeavour to obtain remains but this may not always be possible. Where remains have been retrieved the crematorium staff will call
you to collect them. Where remains have not been requested, they will be scattered
in the garden in the Baby Memorial Area at Carleton Crematorium. You will be welcome to spend time in the Baby Memorial Garden and at a later date you may want to erect a plaque on the Wall of Remembrance.
Option 2
When your baby has died before 24 weeks gestation then, if you prefer, you could take your tiny baby home from hospital and make your own arrangements for a very personalised type service. You are not breaking any laws. For more information, you can find the guidelines on SANDS (Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Charity).
Option 3
You may wish to arrange a private cremation or burial co-ordinated by a funeral director
of your choice at one of the local cemeteries and crematoriums. Your funeral director
will be able to give you more detailed information about each service and any
costs to you.
Staff are here to support you throughout this difficult time and will try to answer your questions.
Support can also be given to you and your partner by the Bereavement Support Nurse. If you wish to speak with her, please ask staff to contact her on your behalf and take the Bereavement Support Leaflet home with you (or download from the hospital website at www.bfwh.nhs.uk/families) as you may wish to arrange support at a later date following your discharge from hospital within 12 months of your baby loss.
The Chaplaincy Team are also here to offer you support at this difficult time. If you wish, they can arrange a blessing for your baby. It is also possible for a service in the hospital chapel to be arranged where your partner and close family members can attend.
If you would like this service and support, ask the staff to arrange for you to meet with one of the chaplains. You also can contact them from home when you are discharged, where they can meet with you at a more suitable time to discuss your wishes.
The loss of a baby is a distressing experience, physically and emotionally, and the services discussed may offer you some comfort at this difficult time
S.A.N.D.S – Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Charity
Tel 0207 436 5881
www.uk/sands.org.uk
Local SANDS Contacts:
Tel: 07938 977676 / 07519 838 791
The local SANDS group meets every month.
See website or call for details –
support.blackpoolpreston@sands.org.uk
www.blackpoolprestonsands.wordpress.com
Blackpool and Preston Sands
The National Miscarriage Association
National Helpline – Tel 01924 200799
www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk
Local Contact – 07340 983954 after 8pm. Local
group meets monthly – see website or call for details
FSID – The Foundation of Infant Death
Tel: 0870 787 0554
www.sids.org.uk/fsid/pubslist.htm
Blackpool and Fylde Cot Death Group
Tel: 01253 723523
ARC – Antenatal, Results and Choices
Tel: 0845 077 2290 or 0207 713 7486
info@arch-uk.org
TAMBA – Twins and Multiple Births Association
Tel: 0800 138 0509
asktwinline@tamba.org.uk
Child Bereavement UK
Tel: 0800 028 8840
email: support@childbereavementuk.org
Aching Arms – Achingarms.co.uk
Tel: 07876 504042
Hospital support services
Bereavement Support Nurse (obstetrics)
01253 956877
Bereavement Support Nurse (Paediatrics)
01253 956713
Chaplaincy Team – 01253 956299
Bereavement Office – 01253 953723
Delivery Suite – 01253 953618
Early Pregnancy Assessment Unit – 01253 953731
Surgical assessment – 012153 953410
